Here are two classics, which will appeal to all the older "Elgin Loons", but will go over the heads of the younger ones. Remember Charlie Whyte, who worked with Hall & Tawse for years, and was recognised by his nose!!!

First one: Charlie went down to the dole office, and when his name was called, the girl behind the desk said: "Hello, Mr. Whyte, what can we do for you". "Well", said Charlie, " I'm gong to Aberdeen to see about an operation on my nose, and I need to claim my train fare". "Very well", said the girl, "But I'll have to ask you some questions first". "Fire away", said Charlie.

"Now Mr. Whyte, how much have you got in the bank"? Quick as a flash, Charlie replies,"Fifty Thousand pounds". The girl nearly falls off her seat and says,'You're joking", to which Charlie replied, "Well, you started it"!!!!!!!!

The next one was even better, when Charlie was walking down the Hgh Street on Saturday morning, and he was stopped by two tourists. "Excuse me sir, can you tell me where we can get a !+!+@"? "Yes" says Charlie, "There's two of them down "Singers Close", but one's been trodden on"!!!!!!!

Oh, for all those characters to be reincarnated!!!!!!!!!!